My Story :: Cocaine User Helping Hand :: Help for cocaine, crack cocaine addicted people. Information on Drug Abuse, Treatment, Recovery.

Re: My Story by Admin

(Score: 2, Informative) on Mar 25, 2005 - 04:55 PM

Thank you for sharing your story. I do believe you should take care of yourself, but I put children in the first place.
Have you try outpatient service in Substance Abuse Treatment Center in you area? You can use This Link to locate one. If you need to talk chat and forum to your service.
Suicide is not a choice at all, it will not make life of your family easy, and defiantly isn't the choice for you. Think of your kids, when you had decided to have them, your also decided to dedicate yourself to be a mom , so be the mom and do your best. After all, it is you, who can change their life and your life for better.

Wish you best, Gene

Re: My Story by dancerica

(Score: 1) on Mar 25, 2005 - 06:40 PM

You've got a friend in me for sure. And I am sure many others on this site. We meet in the chat room frequently, usually in the late evenings. We have managed to form a group of people committed to staying clean and it is going well, we have a great time hanging out and being freinds in the chat room. We are always willing to help each other out and there are a lot of great suggestions around the table. We hold each other's hand, and I do cherish that. So can you. Please feel free to join us there sometime. I know you can beat this. You are in my prayers. Hope to meet you in chat soon.

Dancerica

Re: My Story by Denizen_of_the_Nite

(Score: 1) on Apr 24, 2005 - 02:54 AM

this is my first time doing this ; publicly "talking: about this addiction, I've been to a few meeting, but the physical face to face contact is too much for me- I'm completely selfish with myself as well as with my addiction. But this time I 'm going this route...I hope it sparks in me; it's been a very long time since I believed in anything...specially humanity.

Re: My Story by freedomispreciousFL

(Score: 1) on Mar 25, 2005 - 09:33 PM

I have as well used crack cocaine for the past 5 years of my life. I am only 20, but still cocaine had its way with me.I live in a very small town, I tried to get a job here, and never went to the interview, because I know I will see people whom I used to sell to, or those who were addicts themselves, and close to me in my addiction... EVERY TIME I TURN MY HEAD, I SEE SOMEONE I KNOW. I cannot, and dont ever go anywhere unsupervised, I KNOW IF I WERE ALONE IN THE CITY I LIVE IN, I WOULD END UP USING. I have been clean for only 6 months..but have much hope to the fact that I DONT HAVE TO MAKE THE CHOICE TO USE COCAINE AGAIN. But must make choices that now, will help in that not to be an option of mine... And want to do everything I can so that I dont make that "one choice" of using again. I went to an outpatient program and it really helped me to survive the first few months off of crack cocaine. Being able to talk about anything and everything in my addiction, being around people who understand my feelings, having to take drug tests to live up to (only for myself) and people I can see that let me know it gets worse, IT WAS A BIG STEPPING STONE INTO MY RECOVERY, TO GET HELP WITH IT.

I completely understand the cravings... they are hell sometimes, laying in bed crying, pulling at my hair constantly wanting to get high, dreaming of what it would be like to use "one more time", insane agravation, anger, physical and mental incapability to perform everyday life, nightmares at night waking up wanting to use, or thinking that I did. Thanking God when I actually come to realize that I did not. And are still clean.

I REALLY REALLY recommend that you AND your husband take part in some type of meeting group, whether it be outpatient, or NA, AA meetings. Outpatient first, then NA following. ALL rehab programs are very willing to "take in" loved ones as well, in one on one meetings in order for them to better understand what it is you are going through in this. As of right now, YOU are the most important part of this, YOU must get better before anything else around you can get better. AND an outpatient rehab center, will help you to overcome these things and obstacles you face as well as help your husband to understand. Do an internet search, in info.com...for substance abuse treatment.GET AS MANY PHONE #S AS YOU CAN WROTE DOWN...THEN CALL THEM ONE BY ONE, DONT GIVE UP, ASK AS MANY QUESTIONS AS YOU CAN THINK OF...THEY DONT MIND. It might take some time to find, but that is how I found the inpatient rehab I will be leaving for in 8 days. OR if you find nothing in your city, look in yellow pages online. SEARCH AND SEARCH. DONT GIVE UP.

Look in your local phone book, even call hospitals, or surrounding areas for info about treatment options. Ask about sliding scale fees, or "state funded" rehab options. (if you have payment difficulties, there are ways around it!!) Good luck in your search...come to chat room if you ever need someone to talk to! Hope to hear of your search results soon! BEST WISHES TO YOU!!!

Re: My Story by mrsonny

(Score: 1) on June 29, 2005 - 08:57 PM

Hello freedom is precious,
I can identify with your story, it seems to me that you have not surrendered at all. By taking drug tests to prove that you are clean is part of your present insanity. Each time that you have a craving, play the tape all the way through. Oh yes, the initial intake renderes a euphoria like you have never experianced, then a few minutes later, you come down and are looking for another "hit". When all of the money, ways to get more,and everything is gone; you are left depressed, aggitated and completley discouraged. The only sure results of using are jails\, institutions or death. If you are honestly working a program of recovery, in time, you will not fear running into people whom you sold to or used with.
I suggest that you do 90 meetings in 90 days, then do another 90. At each meeting, raise your hand and tell the truth, the truth about the statements that you made in your story. We are only as sick as our secrets. I went through years of denial before I realized that I could not live a life worth living unless I got and accepted help. You see, we cannot tell help howto help us. I have 3 years and 7 months in my process to live life on lifes' terms without the use of any mind or mood altering chemical or drug...Get and use a Sponsor, read your basic text, pray every day, repeat the serinity prayer until you recieve peace, but whatever you do, and whatever it may take, DO NOT PICK UP!!!!That next "HIGH" may be your last..............chas3262000@yahoo.com........

Re: My Story by Jasmine

(Score: 1) on Apr 10, 2005 - 09:27 AM

Hi, I'm Jasmine, I know exactly what you are going through. It's HARD!?! I need somebody to talk to also, you can email me at jdheadcase@yahoo.com
Maybe we can get through this together. I've actually been searching for someone with whom I can speak with openly but I always seem to find blog sites or message boards or information sites about effects of drugs, etc., with nothing in common with me...I too live in a small town. I too have similar troubles, if not the same. I am glad someone is like me out there. I'm a professional, 30, seperated, coke addict. "It could NEVER happen to me!" Right...
Came from decent family, good education; my life LOOKS okay from the outside. But you always seem to run into it...
It is hard on everybody, especially you. If they haven't been through it, they will never fully feel what you feel or totally understand. It can happen: getting over it. I know that I want to. Email me, let's talk.
Keep thinking positively,
Jasmine Marie Carangi :)

Re: My Story by malissa

(Score: 1) on Apr 27, 2005 - 08:10 PM

Like your story sounds a lot like me. People would be shocked if they knew I was using. Perfect home life. Great parents. 30 years old good job. Own my condo. Comfortable. Why does this grab me? How long have you been using?

Re: My Story by malissa

(Score: 1) on Apr 27, 2005 - 08:09 PM

I started using about a year and a half ago. It was my choice I dated a guy who did it and I wanted to try it, I always had. I tend to want to try certain things. I started out doing it on weekends only, then it got to sleeping at all for 2 days was not normal. Now I do a little everyday. I am worried and scared about my health and want to stop but it seem it helps my social anxiety. Any advise?

Re: My Story by startingovr05

(Score: 1) on Nov 17, 2005 - 01:14 AM

i would love to be your friend cause i will need one myself. My name is Steph. I am a 21 y/o user who has a goal to quit. I am removing myself away from the suburb I live in and am moving into the montains with family to try to kick the addiction.

Re: My Story by bonnie

(Score: 1) on Mar 22, 2006 - 12:24 PM

I am sitting here crying, as i try to write this. My son is 27 years old, and is on cocaine. He is very depressed. He was living on his own for the past 5 or 6 monthes. His Dad and I decided it would be best for him to come back home with us, so we could give him love and support. He is starting rehab next week. He went to rehab about a year ago, but stopped after 2 or 3 visits. He has very hard time sticking to something. Please give us some information, or advise on how to handle him. We are so scared for him. I can't help but wonder if he will even be alive at this time next year.

Re: My Story by Richie2112

(Score: 1) on May 02, 2006 - 09:16 PM

Hello all,

I'm sitting here depressed looking for answers and have come accross your guys stories. Maybe there's hope for me after all. I have one question I need answerd by people like your selves. I used to enjoy life and had a wide range of things I loved to do, not any more. Did you get that back? Is your lives worth living now? Is there a life after Coke? I can go days even a couple weeks with out it but I allways come back. I'ld like to be a happy person again.