Thank you for responding to my story.  I have had many reads but no comments.  I know I am not the only one out there.  I stumbled across this website a week ago and have met a couple of people through it.  One of which has really been helpful.  We have been emailing each other regularly.

Your story does sound a lot like mine.....and shows me what is in store for me down the road.  It is really scary.  Your situation is made a bit worse than mine because you are a stay @ home mom.  That is really tough.

My husband & I have been through a lot.  We got pregnant while I was still a senior in high school.  We immediately got married, lived w/my parents & I finished school.  After my son was born, I went back to work @ both of my part time jobs working close to 50 hours a week, while my husband worked his full time job of 40 hours a week.  It was hard....but even hard was a year later when he told me he wanted a divorce b/c he was still in love w/a girl from 4 years earlier (I think he was regretting being stuck w/a wife & kid).  We ended up working through it and I learned from that experience.  I realized I couldn't depend on him to always be there for me.  I had to admit to myself that he might pull that stunt again & we wouldn't be able to work it out.  So I decided I needed to be able to support my son & myself if I had to.  I went to a 9 month business school to learn legal administration.

Long story short - I have a good job & 2 beautiful kids.  And I predicted my husband correctly.  We have had 3 near divorces over the years b/c of another woman.  Now I am figuring our 4th run in w/divorce will actually end in divorce.  I am still in the denial phase of this addiction.  I just can't quite see him doing cocaine.  But I am scraping to save all the money I can on the side so when push comes to shove, I can take the kids & run like hell.  Unfortunately, we have incurred quite a bit of debt over the years....mainly b/c he loves to spend money & loves his toys.  Right now we have a 2nd mortgage on the house so he can build a garage that has been 6 months in the making & it still is not done.  He swares that it will increase the value of our home enough to compensate.  I pray that if we have to sell our home b/c of divorce that we will get enough $ to pay off our mortgage & give us enough that my 1/2 would be enough for a down payment on a small home for me & the kids.  But I doubt it.

Anyway, I am sorry that you are going through so much.  Is there anyone you can turn to for help?  Family? Friends?  I am figuring that if he is addicted enough that he is selling your jewlry, you should really think about finding some other place for you & the kids to go.  I know you said he has a child from someone else.  Does that woman have custody or  does he?  If she does, then she needs to know about his problem & work on getting full custody.  If not, then you should contact her if that would be a better situation for the child or petition the courts for custody of that child as well as your own.  I know it can seem hopeless but you have to do what you have to for you & those kids.  From what I hear, there is nothing we can do to force an addict to quit. They have to want it on their own and full heartedly want it.  Good luck to you.  And keep checking back on this site.  I hope that it will help you find the answers you need.  God bless you.