New here 8 years with a crack addict husband

dia_cero · Newbie

I really can't take this anymore my husband who is 33 is a crack addict we have a 7 year old girl. My life these past 8 years have been he|l every other week he is using he's sustained a heart attack from his drug use in 2005 and I believe he's going to die. I have read some of the stories here and see that some women have been with their addict husband for 20 or more years I really don't want this to be me. I have lead a very unstable life moving from state to state because of him. (also because I love him) I have horrible credit. He Left last week for florida to find work and a place to live he took all our money and ended up smoking crack and the usual lies came over the end of the phone "I lost my bank card I'm stranded with no gas" so his mom wires him money and I told him to go to a rehab or I was leaving him he agreed but I believe that he only agreed because he was paranoid at the time. I really want to believe that he will drive to the rehab and not spend the gas money on crack because he will die. as for me I plan to return to fl go to school and work so that my daughter can have a more stable life. please any advice is appreciated I have never gotten advice from other people that are in my situation or have been. I'm so glad to have found this place Thank you

Asadwife · Resident

Dia---

You have found an eye of the storm here. Read as much as you can. What you are reading is real. When I first came here that was the greatest comfort that I ever could have found. I felt so lost and so alone and FINALLY I arrived in a place where people really shared the same way I was feeling. See, when I finally came here, I started to really think about what it was I was feeling---trying to pull myself out of the denial and cover ups that I have lived in ever so long. I pray you find that same comfort here. What you won't find is the magic answer. That must come from within. Speaking from my own experience, I expected that I would start reading someone's post and voila the answers would be there. Stupid I know. But what I found at these boards and with the people who have supported me and listened to me is that I need to start spending my energy, efforts, and love on myself not an addict. This will be a long road my friend. If you keep posting I promise to keep reading.

Kelly

dia_cero · Newbie

Thank you for the response I think finding this place will help me reach my decision I have been reading other peoples stories and already I feel more confident on what I should do. Thanks again

Angie

rick_h · 12 step Recruit

Hi Angie,

Its sounds like you are at a turning point. I hope you find the road that is going to work for you. If not try another one. Please remember that you don't have to go through this alone. There is this site a great resouirce that will let you see both the recovery side and the codependant side. There are also support groups like alanon naranon . I encourage you to try all resources within your reach to help yourself. He might make it clean with an ultimadum or he might not - but either way you need to find your own way through this mess.