So, I'm new to this site and I'd like to share my story of recovery. I started using drugs and alcohol at around 10-11 and they quickly became the center of my life. I always though I had *censored sh_t under control because I wasn't using the "hard stuff" very often and just smoking weed and stuff most days. Slowly but surely the weed just stopped cutting it, and I moved on to other things. Manly pain-killers and ecstasy for a while.
I can still remember the first time I took a hit of crack. I *censored F--> the hit up, and though "Well, that was the stupidest thing I've ever done, I cant believe people get addicted to that!". Well, low and behold, I tried it again a few minutes later and got a ringer.
The next year was full of binges on crack, and binges on other drugs in some vain attempt to prove to myself that I wasn't an addict because I used different drugs.
Eventually however, the crack took over completely. I was working as a manager at a 711 and trusted with several thousand dollars on a daily basis. This, as I'm sure you all know, is NOT a good thing for a crack head. I stole, alot. I was lucky in that I quit the job because it was taking too much of my using time from me, and using in the back room sketched me way to much.
So, I was jobless, and a few days later moneyless.. and living in my parents house. Eventually, I started stealing from them, and helping my friends steal from their parents, or anyone stupid enough to leave money lying around.
I wanted out long before it got to me being this hopeless crackhead, but every time I would try and quit, my main dealers would call my house and around looking for me to make sure I wasn't doing anything stupid like quitting. If they found out, they'd toss a free piece and I'd be right back to the binge.
I can remember quite a few times, where I would hit too much, and almost pass out or felt like I was going to die. I never thought that I was really that scared to OD and die, but towards the end, when I really felt like it was give up the drug or die, I just couldn't do it anymore. I checked into detox and stated to clean up my act.
I made a mistake, in thinking I was cured from my 5-day stay in detox and stated drinking heavily. Soon, I was fully relapsed. Luckily, I checked into a rehab program and completed 29 days and graduated.
Today, I am just over 7 months clean. I am actively involved in a 12-step program, and I am in school again, and will be starting college in the fall. I'm 20, and my whole life is ahead of my. I am very grateful that I didn't have to live that life till I was 30 or 40. I doubt that I would've made it to 20 had I not chosen life.
If you fall in your recovery, and you survived it, YOU ARE A MIRACLE. You didn't die, and that's a blessing, so just keep on trying to get this recovery thing. Anyone who survives a round in the ring with crack-cocaine is a MIRACLE.
Miracle... Blessed, whatever term we use to descibe it, I think it is great that you realize how lucky you are to be here posting about 7 months of Sobriety !!! Good for you !!
to the site, and thank you for sharing your story !
Wishing you continued Strength and Peace,
Michelle
_________________ Positives create better results then Negatives
Home
Contact Us
Search
Chat Rooms
Forum
Disclaimer & Policies
Forum FAQ
Search
Usergroups
Preferences
Members List
Fun Store
Watched Topics
Sub-Forum
to the site, and thank you for sharing your story !
