completely frustrated

sad0572 · Newbie

Hi,
This is the first time I have done anything like this. My husband and I both use. I have been wanting to quit for almost a year. He keeps saying he agrees and then brings more home. This crap is completely ruining our lives. Some days I think he sees it, but others I just don't know. We argue all the time, we never have any money. Basically we have no marriage. I can't trust him or rely on him. I believe him when he says he is done, but he NEVER is. I do it too when he brings it home, but I don't go looking for it. I have no job so it is up to him. This has been about 3 years and I want my old life back.

pause4poetry · Moderator

Dear Sad,

Quote:

The only thing you can honestly control is yourself and your own life.

A agree with this, however you could consider taking this one step further by requesting that he not bring drugs into the home that you share. I am aware that it may be a pretty tall request for an addict to make as it limits your opportunity to use because it was so readily available.

There is nothing wrong with setting boundaries that protect you and the direction you want to go. If you are serious about taking back the controls, you need to consider actively removing yourself from situations that enable you to continue using. Taking responsibility for your own sobriety and what it takes to get there will require careful planning on your behalf, but seriously the fact that you don't see your husband jumping on the wagon with you clearly says he is not there yet. Don't allow his addiction to disuade you from forsaking what you truly want for yourself. If you are ready and willing to commit yourself to sobriety .... YOU CAN !

Wishing you Strength and Peace,

Michelle